ok.. enjoy! XDDD

When Love Hurts 30
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Why do you feel so bitter?

“That’s not how I feel…”

Aya’s question was still floating in her mind in spite of she refused to answer it. It wasn’t about feeling bitter or not. What led her to do all what she was doing it wasn’t hate anymore, just pure need. The need to be with the person she loved, the one she’d ever loved. Rancour? Maybe at first, but who wouldn’t feel that way when someone hurts you so bad?

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“You shouldn’t cry this way… It’s just a practice”

“But…”

“A smile suits you better” said Yossi cleaning the tears with her thumb “It makes you shine”

She didn’t know why but Hitomi’s touch made Rika’s heart begin to beat faster. It wasn’t the first time the younger touched her this way and she knew perfectly that Yossi was always kind with all the girls, that she wasn’t special. But Rika-chan couldn’t help that a new feeling began to grow inside her.

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“Yocchan, can we talk a moment?”

“Sure”

They were alone for a few minutes already and Ishikawa thought that it was the best opportunity to tell about what she was hiding for so long.

“You know.., you’re very important to me, don’t you?” Rika-chan was looking at the ground trying to not sound nervous.

“Yeah. You’re very important to me, too”

“What I really mean is that.., latetly, you’re more important to me than anybody else”

The taller girl was looking at her with confused. It couldn’t be possible that Ishikawa was telling her what she thought so she asked to clear up any doubts.

“What are you trying to say, Rika-chan?”

Ishikawa didn’t want to say something stupid or mushy ‘cause she knew Yocchan hated sentimental moments, reason why she thought it was time to do something else. Actions speak louder than words.

As she was kissing Yossi, her body told her that she wasn’t wrong, that she was truly in love with that girl. But, when Hitomi broke the kiss, she knew that she was late.

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The days seemed to not end.

Every time she saw Yossi, Rika-chan wanted to disappear and hide herself under the first rock she finds. How she didn’t realize before about those two? Now it was evident that Maki was more than just a friend to Yossi. The way the looked at each other, how they touched…

Suddenly she felt bad because of what she did and she ran away from Hitomi every time they met, trying to avoid being alone with her. Until one day.

Yossi saw Rika-chan in the hallway and ran after her until cornering her against the wall. Her faces were just a few inches away when the taller spoke.

“I can’t get you out of my mind…”

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“How many times I have to tell you, Ishikawa?!” shouted Yossi like mad “You’re the one! I don’t wanna be with anybody else!”

“Then why you have to go after other girls?!”

“I’m not going after other girls! For God sake!

Rika-chan was crying. It wasn’t the first time they had a fight because of that, but she couldn’t help but feel jealous when she saw her girlfriend near another girl. It was stronger than her. She was insecure ‘cause she knew that Yossi needed something that she couldn’t give to her yet. Maybe she was overreacting but, how someone told her, why she got so mad if she wasn’t hiding anything?

“I’m tired of this, Ishikawa” said Yossi walking to the exit.

“Where are you going?” asked her desperately.

“Just out of here…”

And the door slammed behind her.

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“See? I haven’t lied to you” said the person next to Rika.

Ishikawa was looking at Maki’s door where Yossi was just a few minutes before.

“She’s just playing with you while she’s fucking that bitch”

“No…”

The tears began to roll down her face.

“No…”

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“I’m… I’m sorry, Rika-chan. I didn’t want to…”

Ishikawa was too shocked to say anything. She just could look at Yossi and cry asking her why.

“I’m sorry…” repeated Hitomi who began to cry too.

“Get out…” said Rika finally with and almost inaudible voice “Please…”

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That night is still in her heart like engraved with fire. She didn’t want to forget, even if it hurts so much ‘cause, in some way, it was like having Yocchan with her every time she closed the eyes.

To be continued...